Welcome to the FSQ

Where stupidity brings the ketchup to the fries*

idiot.jpg

Is this real?

It's on the internet so it must be fucking real.

I can't tell if you're joking or not

This was not posed as a question. No answer for you.

no answer.jpg
privacy.jpg

Do you have a privacy policy?

Think of of it this way - If you being on this website were the equivalent of us accidentally seeing your ding-a-ling, we wouldn't tell anyone that your junk looks like a shriveled up Nathan's hot dog that Joey Chestnut wouldn't even touch.

How do I contact TDS?

Before we answer that, you need to ask yourself three questions first. Numero uno - Will this communication benefit TDS in any way? If not, don't contact us. Secondlyo - Will this communication consist of some kind of stupid complaint? If yes, don't contact us. Tresarino - Will this communication result in a financial benefit and/or windfall to TDS? (Similar to the first question, but this one includes money.) If yes, contact the fuck out of us

contact.jpg
reluctant.jpg

I still don't know how to contact TDS

Reluctantly, we will give you the answer.

Send all inquiries to mark@thisdogstinks.com.

You better make that shit worth it.

Can I submit a story or an idea?

Sure, if you really think you've reached the level of our comedic genius. You should know, though, this content doesn't just come to us in our sleep. There's a lot of drinking and/or marijuana involved.

If you think you've got what it takes to go mano a mano with our team, send us what you've got. Put that shit in the body of the email, though. We only open attachments from Egyptian princes or Asian girls named Pia.

Please keep this in mind: We have no money to give you.

prince.jpg
job.jpg

How can I work for TDS?

Well, you'd have to be offered a job first. However, if you're job search consists of perusing the FSQ of a website, you're probably not TDS material.

It would appear that you've got your answer.

Where is Freedom Bluff?

In the greatest, heavily blessed, most beautiful state of the union. Texas. Where hot women wear bikinis in January and fat rednecks drink beer outside their trailers while they watch Cowboys games from their reclining sofas.

redneck.jpg
dumbass.jpg

I have a question that isn't answered here

So? Just because we have this page doesn't mean we have the answers to every stupid question that's running through your mind.

Go to Wikipedia. Pick up your dead grandmother's dictionary. Google that shit.

If we didn't think of the question, it's not worth answering.

*We were high when we thought of this and we're not sure what it means, but it meant something to one of us.